Friday, 26 December 2008
Jane drank a glass of wine with me in a normal way today for the first time.........photo by lanier67
Alcoholism behavior is unpredictable and that proved the case this Christmas. Linda asked how Christmas 2008 went. Well, I am pleased to say it went well. Yep, it actually is still going well and it is hard to believe. She promised me that she wouldn't drink and she hasn't as far as I can see. Well that is not quite true in fact. As I was drinking some wine, she actually asked me if I could pour her some wine too. That I think is a first. As I said she always drinks alone and secretly. I have never seen her drink. I have said to her before a number of times, if she could drink more normally, I might be able to exercise some control over it or Jane might be able to exercise more control.
It would be normalising drinking, making less of a guilt ridden dark secret of drinking and joining the rest of the world. This I had hoped would help to curb the horrendous binges. And for the first time she has drunk normally and in front of me. And she stopped normally afterwards.
OK, good stuff and it feels good. But lets not get carried away. No, definitely not. Alcoholic behavior is very unpredictable. Jane may just have a binge tomorrow for all I know. This though is very unlikely as I sense she is settled at the moment. I wonder whether this is about one thing.
For some time we have been sleeping in separate rooms (and I don't mind admitting this) for a number of practical reasons; one major one being that she binges in bed for 10 days on a frequent basis and during that time it would be impossible to sleep in the same bed or room as her. That would mean constantly moving out and returning. However, last night I slept with her. Maybe the two events are linked (i.e. drinking a small glass of wine with me in a controlled way and sleeping together). Common sense says that they are. What do you guys think? Is this something about alcoholism behavior I should know about? Is greater warmth from me an aid to stopping binging. Probably, yes. But it's hard when she binges. What comes first?
Thanks for asking about me Linda.