The Diary of a Victim of an Alcoholic

Take a daughter who should have been a son. The mother wanted a boy. The mother can barely bring herself to name the child. The mother is cold and emotionally dead. The father is good but Victorian strict - too strict. He is too critical of his daughter. The parents are incompatible. They argue. They shout at each other and don't get on. They stick together because there is nothing better for them. The formative years roll out under this umbrella of uncertainty, antagonism and criticism. The objective of a parent is to instill confidence in a child. The opposite is being achieved. The child becomes very insecure. She grows up. She has low self-esteem. An insecure person with low self-esteem automatically finds life a lot more difficult than it already is. She discovers alcohol and it smooths out the rough edges. It makes her difficult and uncomfortable life more comfortable. Her brain warms to that feeling. As her body becomes habituated to ethanal alcohol she needs more

This is an update. Aren't all the posts update?! I think (just think without any optimism as you can't be optimistic about alcoholism) that Jane might be getting better. What gives me a bit of hope? The other morning, she volunteered some information. She said that she had taken a bottle of wine (that was in the fridge for me!), opened it and then decided not to drink it. She said that she had thought how it would affect me and our cats. WOW. I have always said to her that there must be a moment, perhaps 30 seconds in duration, during which she has a choice to drink or not and at that critical time, this time, she has decided to not drink. This shows a conscience piece of decision making rather than blindly giving in to her addiction. That must be a good sign surely? Well, I hope so and I think she feels good about what she did. I believe that the habit of drinking alcohol can be unlearnt gradually. As the months roll by without drinking the habit gradually fades. It is t