The Diary of a Victim of an Alcoholic

It's gone bad again because Jane has lost her job which has caused her to go into meltdown in my opinion. She has binged three times since she lost her job about a month ago, gone to hospital and has yet to apply for a job. It's all very dire, very bleak and a complete disaster. I genuinely fear for her life. I have hardly seen her in a normal condition since she has been out of work. That is the update. Sorry it is so short but not much more to say to be honest except that it is a depressing situation which has a hopelessness about it which I'm afraid is typical of a binge alcoholic like Jane. Their lives are nihilistic. Bleak and without real hope. Jane can't cope at the moment. It  may change.

Jane has taken a backward step and I am bloody glad I don't live with her anymore. If you saw her flat you'd understand; total disaster. She lives like a busted tramp. She has lost her job and descended in a downward spiral of chaos and turpitude. She is hopeless, and hopelessly lost. Sorry if this sounds critical. It is not meant to be. It is meant to be honest. There is no way you can say anything other than what I have said. To live with her when she is on a binge is like living through a slow motion car crash so I am glad to be out of it although I'd like to see her again when she is normal. We do have some fun together when she is not at the bottom of a black abyss of self-loathing, lying amongst her squalid and sick-drenched possessions. She has been to hospital for pancreatitis. I visited daily and caught a chest infection at the hospital! Can you believe it? It capped an awful winter for me of long term infections. Jane never sticks to her promises. &