Skip to main content

Never Be Right

It will never be right. I guess that is obvious. It is obvious to me but I have learnt to put up with it - until I just can't take anymore. Jane is at the end of the line at work with her absenteeism and with me. If she binges again it could push both me and her employers over the edge. She probably wouldn't get another job.

One of the many problems is that Jane binges when she is off work. So from my perspective she is either at work when I can't do things with her or drunk in bed when I can't do things with her. In practice I am almost living alone already.

The number of great days she has missed is enormous. Sunny, beautiful days when we could have gone out and done something really nice. Instead she has wallowed in her own urine and feces in her moldy bed with empty bottles scattered all around. The whole room pongs to high heaven after she has been binging for five days.

And that is another point. The whole home starts to smell because the horrible smell that she creates leaks out of her room no matter what I do. I have tried sealing up the door but I have to get in to feed her (if I am in the mood).

Jane was good yesterday evening. We actually went out to a local club. It worked. Yet today she has started to drink because she is off for two days and that is a good time for a mini binge. Trouble is mini binges have a habit of becoming maxi binges.

One last point tonight. Jane still drinks secretly. I never see her drink. She still denies that she is drinking when it is obvious that she is. These are signs that she is not a recovering alcoholic but a full blown one. It is only when an alcoholic admits it and opens up that they can begin the journey back to normality. Jane still deceives herself.

Labels

Labels:

Comments

  1. Anonymous3 May 2016 at 10:22

    This is a test comment by the author.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

I'd like to hear the experiences of both alcoholics and the victims of alcoholics, please.

Popular posts from this blog

Alcoholism Signs For Family

If a person regularly falls asleep just after breakfast she is possibly an alcoholic. This is because she has had more than a stiff drink early in the morning. Although, alcoholism signs for the family are hard to spot in my experience. What is my experience? It's being the partner and now (2008) a "live in partner" of an alcoholic for about 9 years. Update: I am still her partner but no longer living with her in 2024 which is 16 years after this page was first written! The first section of this article is by me based on experience. The second part is by Bing's Co-pilot after researching the internet. At the end of the article are some pointers as to whether the person in question is an alcoholic. When I first met Jane I didn't know that she was an alcoholic. At that moment in time I was an innocent to the world of alcoholism. It took me about 3 months to realize that she was an alcoholic. What lead me to this revelation? When I didn't know she was an alcohol...
Post a Comment
Read more

Living With An Alcoholic

Here is what it is like Living With An Alcoholic . Whatever a normal relationship might mean, it doesn't exist. It is snuffed out by the dreaded Mr V (vodka). One of the first things that comes to mind is that alcoholics are known to be unreliable and just plain liars. And I am not being critical of alcoholics. I am just describing the facts. Alcoholism drives the alcoholic to lie and deceive. It becomes a way of life. And broken promises abound. Promises to change and stop. These are all well intentioned but can never be kept until the alcoholic is what AA calls a recovering alcoholic. Recovering alcoholics are alcoholics who are able, for the time being, to control their alcoholism. It is as good as it can get for them and their partner. So living with an alcoholic is a very fragile existence, the relationship always undermined by a breach of trust or a potential breach of trust. Then there are the rows. These occur during the binge drinking or continuous drinking (if the alcohol...
38 comments
Read more

Alcoholics Disappoint

Emptiness born out of continual disappointment - photo by Tch0la =) Alcoholics disappoint all the time. It happens over and over again. As a victim of an alcoholic you think that you can start living even a little bit normally. Just a little bit of normality is all you ask. It is all you crave. And when you think that you are getting there, bang, she screws up again. Jane hardly ever keeps her word. She will promise and never deliver. These are the ways of alcoholics. Or at least the one I am living with. But I think it is pretty normal across the board. Alcoholics disappoint in part because they are constantly being driven by the first priority in their life: where and when to get the next drink. This rules their lives. They probably hate it but I reckon most don't even have an opinion on it. Their mind is full of the desire for that first rush after the neat vodka hits the brain. And then they can't resist the urge to repeat it. Jane does this until she falls asleep. Jane pr...
13 comments
Read more