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Christmas Day Vodka

Yep, she's still on her bed, in her bedroom, bedroom door firmly shut (she likes to be alone when she binges) with only the occasional sound coming out and this morning (it is 6 am) it was the sound of her yawning over and over again.

Although she is or perhaps looks comatose when she drinks neat Vodka, she in fact not sleeping that much at all.

After 7 days or so of doing this she is naturally in a state and one of the many consequences is total exhaustion through lack of proper sleep.

I can testify as can us all to the way alcohol messes up the sleep patterns. It knocks you out and then you wake up early.

What's going to happen today? It's going to be another classic non-Christmas at this home. Food for two in the fridge and only me to eat it. Totally alone again and the ruination of waht should be a friendly and warm time.

She barely eats when she is binging as the alcohol is food (liquid food) and she'll top it up with things like biscuits and the occasional Asda cheap quickie meal, which she'll either ask me to heat up or do it herself (just). She'll then go back to bed to eat it (the bits of it that don't get chucked onto the bed to coagulate.

This is the first post on Christmas day and at the moment nothing stirs; it will though and it's bound to be trouble.

She always binge drinks at Christmas - why? Habit in my opinion and it causes the maximum impact. There are many complex issues to her drinking. I'll be talking about them all over the forthcoming months all being well.

One of the issues is that she always drinks on the important moments when others are depending on her. In other words she wants it seems subconsciously to mess people around, and particularly those close to her around.

Ons such time is of course Christmas. We have a dinner planned tomorrow with my parents that will now have to go ahead without her.

photo reproduced under creative commons copyright _mpd_

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